A Mother’s Addiction Struggles, Triumphs, and Life Remade

I have a clean date of July 15, 2018—on that day, I was picked up on a warrant and had just found out I was 8 weeks pregnant with my youngest daughter. I had relapsed after 5 years clean and sat in Lancaster County Prison, facing addiction while pregnant, homeless, and with my 2 oldest daughters in the care of my family. I spent 5 months in jail that time and then 3 months in treatment. I successfully completed the Lancaster County Drug Court program and have been clean since that day.

My addiction started after a knee injury playing Lacrosse in high school, which started with pain medication and led to a 15-year heroin and meth addiction. Relapse, jail, rehab, and homelessness were my life for a long time. I wanted to stay clean, but my guilt, trauma, and pain kept me trapped in the vicious cycle of addiction. I was slowly killing myself and desperate to get back on track.

My OBGYN doctor, who I first started seeing in shackles and handcuffs, played a huge part in my addiction recovery story. I was placed on Subutex maintenance to keep myself and my daughter safe. She got me involved in services, programming, and personally supported my journey. I followed the suggestions of my treatment team, not only the drug and alcohol team but my medical team as well. I delivered a healthy baby girl despite substance abuse while pregnant and tapered off maintenance shortly after.

Today, I get to be a mother to my daughters. I can help other mothers who come into treatment just as broken & hopeless as I once was and share my experience with them. I am on the board for Children & Youth Services for the Plan of Safe Care Act to support and ensure the safety and well-being of substance-affected infants and mothers/caregivers.

I am honored to do so alongside the OBGYN doctor, who is now a close personal friend of mine as well.

I am grateful to be alive for my daughters and to be able to help others navigate their addiction struggles!